Narmina

My first visit to Azerbaijan, Baku, I stood in the Baby house with patience and excitement. My eyes filled with tears as I watched the workers bring the babies in to each family from my group. As the parents laid eyes on their babies for the first time, the feeling was so overwhelming. Just as my excitement was at its highest level another baby house worker came through the door with Narmina. I can honestly say, that was the most special moment in my life. The only thing that kept going through my mind was "Breathe Jennifer, Just Breathe". Narmina was so attentive and so alert. She was very concerned with everything that was happening in that room. I was so lucky to have my mother join me on this wondrous adventure. Something that she whispered, I will never forget. And I quote, "I am witness to three new families being born." I think for the first 30 minutes each family sat with their new babies and cried with joy in their hearts. You go through a long waiting, paper producing time period wondering if it is going to all be worth the stress and strain. Just as women experience labor paUSCIS when giving physical birth, adoptive parents have their own pain. When both sides see their babies for the first time, all of the hardship and pain vanishes USCIStantly. There is a mystic reaction that appears at the first meeting of the eyes. No matter how the two or three of you got there, right here right now is all that matters. And believe you me, the feelings are still as strong even six months later. There are times, that I find myself still saying, "Breathe". So as we sat visiting for the first time, Narmina never uttered a word but never cried, eyes always wide open, and a very simple grin from time to time. I didn't check her over, I didn't change her clothes, I was there just to love her and to hold my daughter for the first time. After a few days of visiting and the court date final it was time to say goodbye and leave our babies for the amount of 30 days. I can say with all honesty, I was never concerned, worried, or upset about leaving Narmina at the baby house. After all the workers and the directors had been raising her for the first nine months of her life. They had done a wonderful job. Narmina was very happy and overly content. I left Baku satisfied, knowing that I would return in 30 days.

On the second visit to pick Narmina up from the baby house, things seem to be a little more hectic. I can still state it was worth it. In the crazy moments, I wouldn't believe it. But now at home with my daughter, I would do it again. Our second visit was even extra special. I was able to pick up Narmina the day after my birthday. The best birthday present I ever received. Not to mention, there is a holiday "Victory Day" that is celebrated on the same day as my birthday in Russia and in Azerbaijan. Let me just say for the record, Azerbaijan birthday cake is fantastic. The days after picking up Narmina were a little tough getting use to. I am a new mommie and this is the first time in Narmina's life that she has had someone over her all day and all night. We have learned together.

Now that Narmina and I are home each day seems to be a new adventure. It is interesting to watch an adopted child develop. The catching up period seemed to have gone very quickly. Everyday I see a new achievement that has been accomplished. With in four months the baby that I brought home has changed two shoe sizes and now has the face of a toddler.

I have been blessed with a wonderful daughter, and my life is now complete. Narmina and I will grow together for the rest of our time here on earth. I look forward to being able to teach Narmina about Azerbaijan. That is her country where she was born. I feel a strong bond with the people of Azerbaijan. I experienced a very emotional time in their country and now Azerbaijan holds a large place in my heart. The workers at the baby house, the coordinator, and the translator will always be in my thoughts. I look forward to the many trips to Azerbaijan with Narmina. It will be wonderful to keep the connection alive. When my group had the interview with the Judge in Baku, he told us that as the new parents of these children we have the right to teach them anything, but if the children every asked questions about their history, to please let them know that their country loved them and wanted the best possible life for them. His final note to me was that Narmina and I will always be welcome. I am a very proud American, but my heart must now be shared with the country that has blessed me with my one and only hearts desire. I have an attitude of gratitude for the many people that help me through the adoption process. As the days pass I watch my daughter with ever greater joy and tears of happiness. A miracle has occurred and I thank life for the opportunity to be a mother to a special child.

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